When I hear the words Musk, Bezos, Buffet, and Gates, dollar signs flash in my mind like slot machines at the Horseshoe Casino. Like most people, I don’t think of myself as having much in common with billionaires. In this case, however, it turns out I was wrong.
Robert Ralph Parsons, better known to the world as Bob, is a 73-year-old Baltimore native whose memoir, Fire in the Hole: The Untold Story of My Traumatic Life and Explosive Success, invites readers to join him on a journey from his humble childhood in Highlandtown, through the thick mud of Vietnam rice paddies, into parenthood, failed marriages, and on to the momentous success of his many business ventures, including GoDaddy and Parsons Xtreme Golf, just to name a few. With stark honesty and the occasional crassness befitting a Vietnam-era Marine, Fire in the Hole! feels as straightforward as the man himself.
If the answer to the question “When should I write a book?” is “when you have enough stories to fill one,” then Parsons’s decision to pursue this project was wise—the man has stories. The first chapter features a family history steeped in injustice and lawlessness, which provides a perfect rough-around-the-edges framework for the picture of the Parsons family that follows.
Bob was born in 1950 to parents Elsie and Ralph, the first of three children in what we learn was a loveless home. “Mom was a stunningly beautiful woman who had all the love beaten out of her as a child. As a result, she didn’t know how to give love.” His father, a failed businessman and a gambler, was often absent, though Bob credits both parents with “doing the best they could.” Given his less-than-ideal start in life, it makes sense that Bob struggled at school. In fact, he failed the fifth grade (though he managed to avoid repeating it—learn how he pulled that off in “’Fair’ is What You Pay When You Get on a Bus”) and credits his enlistment into the Marine Corps as his only way out of high school. As he puts it, “Had I not joined, I don’t believe there was a shot in hell I would’ve gotten my diploma.”
Chapter seven, titled “Tell Your Mama to Sell the Toilet, ‘Cause Your Ass Is Ours!”, begins Bob’s journey into the sacred brotherhood of the United States Marine Corps. An Army vet myself, I felt immediately at home amidst the chaos and camaraderie that comprised his basic training experience (though the version I experienced in 2012 probably was a cakewalk compared to his in ‘68). There is something sacred about shared suffering that bonds you to your fellow servicemembers. With the Marines, Bob discovered himself, developing self-respect and a sense of belonging, a feeling that has stuck with him throughout his life. Once a Marine, always a Marine.
Throughout the next several chapters, Bob recounts his time in Vietnam. Some of the lighter-hearted moments include errant snake shooting and failed attempts at grenades, as well as pilfering a “rubber lady” (and no, that doesn’t mean what you think). Mostly, though, Parsons tells of loss—lost sleep, lost innocence, lost Corpsmen. An injury led to his removal from the jungle, though he tried hard to return. Eventually, his enlistment ended, but his gratitude to the men and women who fought alongside him stands strong to this day. In fact, the book is dedicated to them.
After his time in service, Bob settles down and starts a family. Like me, he used his G.I. Bill to attend the University of Baltimore while working full-time to support his family. During that time, he found himself battling symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), though he didn’t understand its implications fully until much later in life. Later, he acknowledges untreated PTSD from his time at war and his difficult childhood had a significant impact on his marriages and his children. His pursuit of treatment decades later and his advocacy for veterans are indicative of his willingness to do hard things. From a generation of men who were taught to swallow their pain until they drowned, I found Parsons’s pursuit of healing to be as refreshing as it is inspiring.
There is more in the book about his business ventures that skyrocketed his family from barely making it to living the high life—stories worth reading and perhaps taking note of if you’re an entrepreneur. But I found the parts about his childhood, time in service, and his relationships with friends and family to be the most compelling. That’s probably because, unlike the billion-dollar ideas, I find the other bits more relatable. Overall, I found Bob Parsons to be relatable, which surprised the hell out of me. Bob Parsons—the billionaire I’d have a beer with (though, to be sure, he’s buying).
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Baltimore Launch Event
Monday May 6, 4 p.m.
Book talk and Q&A with Bob Parsons, moderated by Kurt Schmoke
University of Baltimore Wright Theater, 21 W. Mt. Royal, 5th floor
Followed by signing and reception.
Send your R.S.V.P. for this event.
